Behold! The Knitted Beaver!

November 26th, 2009

I recently came across this merry little song between some old radishes and copies of the Sunday Times. Apprently it was written in 1678 and must be accompanied by a Lyre or a Lute or another instrument that starts with ‘L’.

The Ballad Of The Knitted Beaver

Knitted beaver, knitted beaver
Left a legacy of some discrepancies
Knitted beaver, knitted beaver
Danced a merry jig ‘twixt the bow and brig
Knitted beaver, knitted beaver
Took a candy cane and fled the Spanish Main
Knitted beaver, knitted beaver
Swam to sunny shores, full of leggy whores

And then and then
He strode around with his conkers down
Showing off in front of local sailors
Having witty talks with tailors

Knitted beaver, knitted beaver
Chased accordingly and metaphorically
Knitted beaver, knitted beaver
Left the leggy whores with their stores
Knitted beaver, knitted beaver
Found a tiny land with no marching band
Knitted beaver, knitted beaver
Drank his life away, wasted every day

Drank his life away, couldn’t hold a tray
Couldn’t hold a tray
Couldn’t hold a tray

Entry Filed under: Beaver

4 Comments

  • 1. Chris  |  November 26th, 2009 at 14:55

    I’ve heard it before. I think Girls Aloud covered it last year.

  • 2. Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver  |  November 26th, 2009 at 23:10

    No way! I did find myself whistling along as though some third-rate yet highly sexual girl group had crooned away in a sexy top ten fashion.

  • 3. Chris  |  December 1st, 2009 at 17:29

    Yeah, they did it on that show wearing those things, you know, that time, last year or something.

  • 4. Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver  |  December 1st, 2009 at 19:44

    I remember. Yep, that show wearing those things when they were on the… doing the… with the singing into those things and those others. Clear as day.


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