User avatarBook news

Are you ready?

OK then, here it is.

The Book is finished.

I have finally, FINALLY, written the final page of the Book and the story is complete. I’m going to scan it in so you can read it to your children and share it with your friends, and you’ll have to wait until then to get hold of the thrilling finale. What will happen to Eric Bins? Will Dr. Rombobulous Combobulation succeed? Only time will tell.

In the meantime, I’ve typed it up so that we don’t have to read handwriting in the online version, and I can present you with some statistics.

The finished book is 34 pages long, which means we all did eleven pages and I did one extra at the end.

  • Ian wrote 2,563 words
  • Kev write 2,505 words
  • I wrote 3,220 words and am therefore the winner

The first page of the book was written on 10 January 2009, and I finished writing the last one on Thursday, so it has taken us 3,226 days to write it, or exactly eight years and ten months. We have averaged one page every 94 days – less than four a year – or, if you prefer, two and a half words a day. I think we can all be proud of that.

15 comments to Book news

  • Can we all be proud of that? I don’t think Kevin should be.

  • Let’s just be proud for a bit. The time for pride is now.

    Blame will come later.

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    Can I stand proud or should I be sitting down? Yesterday I was proud of how well I ate my lunch. It was classic lunch eating.

  • I think this, plus your lunch excellence, means you should stand proud for a bit. Not too long though.

    I did some proud lying down earlier. It made me proud to be proud.

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    Do you remember when you were keen? Which do you prefer, proud or keen?

    I’ve seen you keen.

  • I’m always keen to be proud, but I’m particularly proud of when I was keen.

    I think, if you want to know what I prefer, I would have to say I prefer roast beef with all the trimmings.

  • I think you were both keenest and proudest when you saw me doing the Vic Reeves hand swivel stance outside that pub in Crizzle Palizzle. I inspired a lot of people that night.

  • That was a keen, proud time, for sure. It almost merits a new word: kroud. I was very, very kroud.

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    Is that due to the fact that ‘preen’ is already a word?

    (#thekevincoffeeteaargument)

  • That is exactly why. I nearly wrote it and then I didn’t.

  • I am disappointed it has taken you this long to finish it off if I’m honest.

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    I’m glad we’re on the same page even if Kevin is off in his own world, stretching weasels and not finishing things.

  • Yeah, I know. If I hadn’t spent so much of the last eight years storing it in a drawer and occasionally losing it altogether for periods of over a year it would have been done much sooner. I can only apologise.

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    Woe betide you, and also, hang your head in shame (ness).

  • My head is hanging as low as possible, weighted down with the heaviest woes and betidings.

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