User avatarThe Majestic Bird Goose

Bird Goose

Some say that the name Bird Goose is one descriptive word too many. Some may be right, but the majestic Bird Goose cares not for those people. In fact he poops in their garden and then struts away (seen above).

Bird Goose is an excellent strutter and can often be found swaggering, striding or prancing in a pond near you (not seen above).

Bird Goose often wears incredibly fancy shawls (not seen above).

Bird Goose.

Bird.

Goose.

27 comments to The Majestic Bird Goose

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    I’m gonna tell you what I told Eamonn Holmes:

    “It’s not big and it’s not clever and put your clothes back on, because the police are at the door.”

  • Is the bird goose related to the elusive fish bird?

  • Kevil

    I guess so, they both have bird in their name. Sounds logical.

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    Do they taste nice and, if so, should we have one stuffed this Christmas?

  • They taste like chicken. Everything tastes like chicken.

  • Kevil

    What about chicken nuggets? They don’t taste anything like chicken.

  • That’s true. Food is confusing.

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    So everything tastes of chicken except the things that are supposed to taste like chicken.

    What do beech trees taste of?

  • Chicken, I imagine. Or beaches.

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    Gotcha. What a sandy treat that much be. I’m not one for nautical tastes but next time I’m passing one I’ll have a nibble.

  • It’s like a banana. You have to peel it. The good stuff’s under the bark.

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    You… peel bananas? You don’t just push them into your mouth, like a dumpling or a happy meal?

  • You have to unwrap a happy meal too. The house-shaped box isn’t part of the food.

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    What about the small hard object that’s next to the burger. You can eat that though… right?

  • Yeah. Everything in the box is edible. I like the ready salted chip box best.

  • Elena....

    Chicken nuggets taste exactly like factory made, processed chicken should taste, I’ll have you know.

    And I’ll tell you what’s more, fish birds are a real thing. Saw them on the telly this weekend, I did.

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    We’ll need some sort of evidence. You can’t make blasé remarks like that, Miss Wolfson, without a picture or a chalk drawing. Or a tattoo.

  • Elena....

    Well, isn’t David Attenborough’s word enough? He is basically more respected than God.

  • Elena....

    Well, isn’t David Attenborough’s word enough? He is basically more respected than God.

  • You said it twice so it must be true.

    Actually, I saw it too. The fish bird is real.

  • Elena....

    My phone wasn’t letting me onto the Beans properly last night.

    YAY! SEE! Someone else saw it too! I’M NOT CRAZY!

  • Elena....

    Can I html an image into this comment box?

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    Well, isn’t David Attenborough’s word enough? He is basically more respected than God.

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    Woah. What the… that was a bit strange.

  • Kevil

    Did Ian just see god? Did the word of David Attenborough speak to him from a burning bush?

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    I was possessed by the spirit of the majestic gorilla duck.

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