Logical Dreamscape (4)

July 20th, 2010

I am getting very worried about my present state of mind…

It’s mid-afternoon and I’m going to a party with a friend (no idea who it was). This wasn’t just any party though it was a party being held by tiny guitar genius Prince. It is being held in a huge hall however on the inside it’s not very grandiose; instead it retains the look of a simple working men’s club with aisles of seats, various rooms and a bar on the side. I pull up to the bar for a drink and for some reason there is a rumour spread that you can’t stay at the party unless Prince’s personal physician has checked you out to make sure you’re not ill and won’t pass any illnesses onto him. This seems very strange but my reasoning is that, “this is Prince, not just anyone. I’ll take a quick once over from a quack for an all night drinking sesh.” Something along those loins, lines, lions, lines.

People keep going into a room at the back with a nurse and coming out smiling. I get the impression I’m missing out on something. The strange thing is that we’ve hardly seen Prince at all other than a man, who could have been Prince, standing at the far end of the room on his mobile dressed in a purple suit. Everyone seems to go in before I do and I’m getting pretty nervous as people are starting to leave. I get tapped on the shoulder by a nurse who leads me into a tiny room filled with stacks of chairs and a man in a white coat.

I lie down, he checks me over and does a few initial inspections; no problems. Then he puts some sort of machine over me and examines my inside, which are relatively fine, except for some gunk here and there. The doctor uses a gauze and what looks like a cloth to clean my ribs at the back. It tickles a little. I get no attention whatsoever from any of the nurses, as a few more have appeared since I arrived.

The doctor pats me on the back and tells me everything is fine. I leave the room too with a smile on my face but something doesn’t feel right. Looking down underneath my t-shirt there is a line of huge, awful, bloody vertical stitches stretching from my chest down to my pelvis. Then I wake up.

Entry Filed under: Bedtime stories

4 Comments

  • 1. Dr. Humphrey Bumfrey M.D.  |  July 21st, 2010 at 00:10

    Yeah, you’re a bit wrong in the head, mate. I’d get that checked out. We do a full brain replacement for £14.99 if you buy two years’ medical cover from us. Take it or leave it. See you round.

  • 2. Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver  |  July 21st, 2010 at 07:45

    You see that, right, that is what happens when you eat curries at 6am. I mean him not me. I ain’t chowing on no curry, fool.

  • 3. Chris  |  July 21st, 2010 at 16:16

    Nothing wrong with that. 6am curry is valid. Isn’t that right, Dr Humphrey Bumfrey?

    …He’s gone. But he’d definitely have said yes.

  • 4. Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver  |  July 22nd, 2010 at 07:53

    6am is curry valid.

    Can I get a bumper sticker with that on perhaps?


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