Avatar Ode to a Broken Spoon

Some months ago, while stirring a particularly stiff risotto – which, really, needed more liquid as it was far too solid in that state – I applied too much pressure and snapped the wooden spoon in half.

It’s only now, with the passage of time, that I feel able to begin to come to terms with this tragic event and to put some of my feelings into words.

I have now written a poem about this incident. I’m sure you understand how difficult this is for me and I’d be incredibly grateful to have your support.

Broken wooden spoon

Wooden spoon, wooden spoon
Hardwood utensil
For my cookery a boon
In rice-filled pan
You tried your best
But perished when you faced the test

Your shaft bore the scars
Of previous mistreatment
Of singes and overheating
At my behest

I feel
I regret
I cry
To the moon
For you
For you
My spoon

12 comments on “Ode to a Broken Spoon

  • I once wrote a song about being in love with a spoon with a face drawn on it and was on the verge of uploading it to da Beans. Is there enough space for two such marvels?

  • A sensible person with an eye on keeping our output varied and appealing would consider delaying it so that two spoon topics didn’t sit right next to each other.

    But that’s not the sort of operation we’re running here. Like Kev says, do it.

  • It’s nice that we’ve established a democracy and that it still means something after all these years. I will proceed as discussed.

    In other news, tough call on the spoon. You can tell by the dark colour that this was clearly well-loved. Did it have a name?

  • No. It’s to my eternal regret that it never had a name. If I’d named it, maybe the spoon would have understood how much it meant to me while we were still able to work together.

    If I’d given it a name, I would probably have called it Colin.

  • Colin is a good name for a spoon. If he were here now he would understand what you have said today, possibly with a mini wooden tear in his eye.

  • “We’ll meet again, don’t know where, don’t know when, but I know we’ll meet again someday.”

  • Didn’t we have a wooden spoon called Colin in “An Evening with Kev and Chris”?

  • Wasn’t there also a wooden spoon in that video we did with Mr Random Street Crime and Priscilla the Hamster? Come to think of it, don’t we involve wooden spoons in a lot of what we do?

  • There was definitely a wooden spoon in An Evening With Kev and Chris”, possibly even two, but I don’t know their names. I think one was a woman.

  • You seem to care more about the ones in your kitchen than the ones in your productions. Why’s that?

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