When you think of Christmas what immediately comes to mind? Decorations? Presents? Singing carols on the doorstops of strangers for fun to bring back the festive cheer to everyone?
Yeah, me too.
What doesn’t come to mind is any of this.
When looking for a Christmas tree a few weeks ago, I found these monstrosities dotted around a garden centre.
Why are they all playing the saxophone? Why do they all look like they’ve been drugged at the office Christmas party? When did they all have time to learn how to play an instrument? Why would anyone pay £19.99 for a single saxophone-playing Christmas toy?
I don’t know, but what I do know is that if you’re looking to make your house a little more festive then this is not the way to do it. Once you start mixing jazz and Christmas then you’re staring down the barrel of a Kenny G album.
12 comments on “Jazzy Christmas”
Yeah.
Why is it spelled “saxx”? In what world does the English language spell words with a double X?
Basement Jaxx had that extra ‘x. Although, come to think of it, what is a ‘Jaxx’?
I don’t know, but I assume there are several types, only one of which is suitable for use below ground level.
Perhaps you go down the big jaxx mine to source all the jaxx you need for whatever structure you’re building. I’m sure I saw one of those whence last driving through County Durham.
Do you think there are other Jaxxes? Attic Jaxx? Balcony Jaxx? Mezzanine Jaxx?
There has to be otherwise why would they specify a particular level? There’s a jaxx for every level in the house. Kev is already making plans for 2026 to refresh his many jaxxes.
I usually hire them in, they need a lot of specific maintenance. The lobby jaxx is my favourite, really gets the job done.
I don’t want to know what job gets done.
Kev and his sexual lobby? I’ve been to his house many times and never seen such a thing.
Then again, Kev does apparently have a clock in his toe and this is the first I’m hearing about it after being friends for… 30 years.
I suppose when your house is that big you have to find new uses for all the rooms. Once you’ve exhausted all the other kinds of lobby you presumably just end up deciding one is a sexual lobby.
That’s true. He owns more land than the King now. He’s furious and keeps trying to build towers on aircraft carriers like a mad man.