I recently got hold of a bike, in an attempt to do something energetic at least occasionally, rather than just spending literally my entire life either sitting down or being asleep.
What I didn’t count on was how dangerous it is round here. Get off the main roads and you suddenly find yourself in a terrifying danger zone of army firing ranges and other macho activities that are entirely incompatible with my naturally timid demeanour. A simple bicycle ride in the country suddenly becomes a horrifying scramble through live gunfire and explosions, like a scene from Rambo but with me in a bike helmet passing through the background.
Please find below a selection of pictures to document my emotions during a ride through this difficult environment.
6 comments on “Danger cycle”
Where’s the fourth photo where you were shot by the army and Kate had to drive you to the hospital?
The blood is too overwhelming to share that one on a family website like this.
Use one of them Google phones and move along the bloody bits. Pretend it’s a photobomber or something. I’ve seen the internet adverts I know what the score is #modern
Even if I wanted to I still couldn’t because the picture was confiscated by MI5. They said it would be a risk to national security because I was shot with a secret spy bullet. Also, in the picture, the ambulance crew had to cut my trousers off and you can see my arse.
A rear spy bullet? Hmmm, sounds a bit *whistles* if you ask me.
I can’t comment on the extent to which it may or may not have been *whistles* due to the Official Secrets Act, which now applies to my arse.