User avatarLike the wind

Today one of my colleagues was looking for me. I could tell because there was a voice from the corridor that said “where’s Chris?”. At that particular moment Chris was sitting on a chair in the office where he usually sits, so this was not a mystery that would take long to solve.

A moment later the owner of the voice came through the door and said “how did you get there? You weren’t here a minute ago”. This was true. A minute ago I had been in the toilet having a little wee. But discretion is the mark of a gentleman, so I chose not to mention it.

My colleague contemplated my mysterious and unexplained arrival, and declared that I was like the wind, moving about silently and without being seen. That is not a comparison that has ever been made before, and if I were to dispute it I’d say that all I’d done was call in to the bathroom while moving from one room to another, and it was just chance that my colleague had been trying to find me at the moment when I was not in one place or the other. But I chose not to dispute it because I like this idea.

Yes. I am like the wind.

8 comments to Like the wind

  • Are you like Ian’s wind?

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    I hope not. I think he’s more like real wind, like actual wind, like wind. Blowy wind. You know wind?

  • No. I am not to be compared with Ian’s gastric outrages. Ian is right, I am like actual, blowy wind.

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    Did Patrick Swayze write ‘She’s Like the Wind’ about you?

  • No, that’s not true. But Bette Midler did write “Wind Beneath My Wings” about me.

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    What about ‘Windy’ by the Association? I was always convinced that was about you, before the accusations that you are the wind.

  • I don’t know that one so I’m going to say no. “Mandy” by Barry Manilow is about me, though.

  • Ian "Mac Mac Mac Mac" McIver

    How did you feel when Westlife covered it?

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