Avatar Not Kev

A little while ago, in the comments thread of another post, Ian and I were musing about how we could get more material from Kev on the Beans, and Ian suggested we use AI to churn out some generic Kev-like material for a new “Not Kev” account.

Unfortunately there just isn’t enough genuine Kev blog material to feed in to an AI to teach it what it should be writing, so I suggested padding it out with a load of Jilly Cooper novels.

Anyway, long story short, I got ChatGPT to write us some “Not Kev” blog posts and, while they have turned out with a fairly heavy Jilly Cooper influence, they’re still basically decent enough to be posted under Kev’s name without anyone noticing the difference.

I’ve actually got three of these ready to go, but I think this is the best one.

The Romantic Appeal of the Stable Boy

As someone who’s been around horses a lot, I can tell you that there’s something undeniably romantic about the equestrian world. Maybe it’s the thrill of the ride, the beauty of the animals, or the sense of freedom that comes from galloping across an open field. Whatever it is, there’s a certain magic to it all.

But there’s one aspect of this world that’s often overlooked when it comes to romance: the stable boy. Perhaps it’s because they’re seen as too rough around the edges or too lowly in class to be worthy of a lady’s attention. But I beg to differ.

There’s something about the sturdy, hardworking stable boy that sets my heart aflutter. Maybe it’s the way he smells of hay and horses, or the muscles rippling beneath his shirt as he hauls a bale of straw. Maybe it’s the fact that he’s so in tune with nature, able to read the moods of the animals and predict the weather with uncanny accuracy.

Or maybe it’s just that there’s an air of danger and excitement around these young men. They’re not afraid to get their hands dirty, to take risks, to push themselves beyond their limits. And in a world where so much is sanitized and safe, that kind of raw energy is incredibly appealing.

So yes, I confess that I have a soft spot for the humble stable boy. And who knows? Maybe one day I’ll find myself swept off my feet by one of these rugged, handsome knights of the stable. After all, stranger things have happened in the romantic world of the equestrian.

10 comments on “Not Kev

  • Three of these means you’ve got enough posts for the rest of the month. You’ve got this, leave it to you.

    Also, this is pure Kev and I wouldn’t have known a robot bot-bot had written it.

  • You’re right, it’s pretty much indistinguishable from a real Kev post. Thankfully Kev has made so few posts that nobody really knows what a blog post by Kev would look like. I think this is as good a guess as anyone’s.

  • I think that, by the time Kev’s kids have grown up, we’ll have been able to go back and edit all his other posts to replace the text with AI-generated stable boy content.

  • By then we will be able to program some AI bot to do this on our behalf, possibly with the AI-generated content inserted. Why all we need to do is type this button and it all happens automatically. In’t life grate?

  • That’s where predictive text should be taking us. Right now I can start typing a word and it will guess the rest of it. Sooner or later my keyboard should just have a single button and when I press it, it guesses the whole word. Then after that I should just have to press the button once and it will guess all the words. Typing will be extremely simple, as will reverse-engineering all of Kev’s work on the internet to replace it with mildly obsessive stable boy fiction.

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