It was my birthday, obviously, but as an adult man with his own bank account I very rarely have a list of gift-sized things that I want but don’t yet have. As a result, when Kev and Ian came knocking with birthday questions, the only thing I could think of was that I needed a toolbox because the house is littered with all sorts of DIY paraphernalia.
They sent me some money. I ordered the one I wanted. Yesterday it arrived.
It’s enormous.
In many ways, that’s great, because it has absorbed not just all the tools I own, but also a range of other miscellaneous things, including a set of 100 drill bits in its own heavy duty carry case, a picture hanging kit, several pairs of goggles, miscellaneous other items of workwear, and it still has room to spare. In other ways it’s a bit dispiriting because the measurements of this box match the measurements on the listing I chose (I checked them) and yet somehow I failed to appreciate that I was ordering a toolbox that is only marginally smaller than my car.
Still, there’s plenty of room to add more stuff in future, which is good, and if I ever go camping, I’ll just take this and sleep inside it. Win win. Thanks everyone.
9 comments on “The toolbox has arrived”
Big Man finally got a Big Box for his Big Tools. This is a positive moment if ever I read one.
That’s right. Big Man’s going to do some Big DIY with it pretty soon. Maybe hammer some massive nails into a huge wall or something.
Are you gonna do it wearing some kind of manly tool belt, possibly in a checked shirt with a false beard?
Exactly. Two checked shirts at once, and a false beard over my real beard. I’ll also hire a white van, which I’ll park badly outside the house, and put a few McDonalds wrappers on the dashboard.
Don’t forget the nudie girl mag or some kind of antiquated Page 3 supplement which hints at boobs, oh and a half-eaten Mars Bar.
How about a badly tattered old copy of Nuts magazine with a boot print on it?
Perfect. Can you also be talking slightly too loudly into your mobile phone to someone called Dave about ‘that job that’s turned into a nightmare’?
Yes. But the person on the phone will be Tony, who will be in coach D.
Tony has to speak to Tony before Tony can do anything. It’s the special relationship that Tony and Tony have that really holds the collective of Tonys together.