Coming soon to a multi cineplexical screen near you…
“In a world where bathrooms are neglected, in a world where taps are taken for granted, in a world where washing your hands is no longer a common practice… he appeared!”
I’m going to go shopping for taps!
“It started off as a regular Sunday afternoon of bathroom fittings shopping with his lunatic wife, but fate had a different plan in store for Kevindo Menendez…”
In B & Q, the excitement is building! Tapgasm!
“His last minute substitution for taps and need for unnecessary DIY was about to send him on a journey he wasn’t prepared for, nor wanted to go on…”
FUCKING ARSE BOLLOCKS (sound of a breaking sink) WHO FUCKING FIXES IN A TAP WITH RESIN???
“… and so Kevindo Menendez was faced with a broken sink, a ruined finger and a thirst for adventure. This March feel the excitement, feel the magic, feel the tapgasm of the Tap Saga!”
A pox on Parcel Force!
“Sinking into cinemas March 27th.”
13 comments on “Tap Saga”
Do i get to play me in the movie or have you cast Ryan Reynolds again?
We tried to call you but you were too busy sorting some bathroom problem so we got Gary Wilmot instead.
I think Ryan Reynolds is going to play Sarah though.
The character of ‘me’ has a very minor role and if we’re lucky Bobby Costanzo will be playing ‘me’.
Gary Wilmot? Could you not get Biggins?
I thought we’d booked James May to play you… He works cheap.
Who’s playing me? If it’s Cheggers I’m going to be well miffed.
Its Cheggers. Although on the plus side, we have convinced him to keep his pants on.
I’m still fairly miffed but the pants thing is good news. You have to take what you can get sometimes.
Why is nobody thrilled that Bobby Costanzo is playing ‘me’?
No one knows who he is?
Are you kidding me? With a legacy like this you’ve never heard of him?
I honestly thought he was just another character you’d made up. I was all set to send him down the hatch.
You can’t send Bobby down the hatch.
He sometimes doubles for Danny Devito don’t you know. What a guy. I’m going to try to buy you a signed photo.