Surprises, eh? Lovely stuff. They come in all shapes and sizes from a fist in the mouth to a great big cake shaped like Vince Vaughan. What you do for your surprise is up to you, or not as the case may be. If you want a specific surprise you have to be very direct to the person you want the surprise to be… ach, I’m not making much sense. It’s too early for thinking.
When I returned from work earlier on this week I was greeted with a mysterious parcel through my letterbox. I knew three things:
- The item was thin (the packaging was super floppy)
- The item was from Amazon.
- I hadn’t ordered anything recently from Amazon.
I was completely surprised then to know that I was now in the possession of ‘Bedtime for the Burpee Bears’ by thoroughly nice person but also walking charisma vacuum Joe Wicks. I haven’t had a chance to read it yet but as I am about to go on holiday it would make sense to take it with me as a bit of light reading on the plane or in the hotel room. It’s an epic, 12 or 13 pages long, with additional exercise and recipe ideas which are, “perfect for sharing.” If anybody needs these things you know where to find me.
The mystery therefore stems from the question of whom would send me such a thing, who would be generous enough to send such a beautiful thing, and only two groups of people come to mind: my brother and my mischievous nieces, who are the most likely candidates, and Kevin and wor Ted.
I guess we’ll never know. I’m off to make a sunshine smoothie to wash down the banana pancakes.
Do I do the burpees before or after the food?
Where’s sodding Joe Wicks when you need him?
3 comments on “Book surprise”
This is a terrible surprise. It sounds like a horrendous book and if you were to read it to a child I would fully support the child in setting fire first to the book and then to the building where you tried to read it to them.
You… you do realise I didn’t write this book, right? Your description sounds very similar to how you behave around my award-winning pieces of literature.
I realise that your name isn’t on the book. But that leaves open the possibility that you are a ghost writer, turning out dreadful children’s literature on behalf of Joe Wicks, who is probably too busy doing star jumps to write anything down.