2021 is turning out to be a right sad-sack of a year. It’s currently trailing behind 2020 with a forlorn look on it’s mug, a napsack of woe and wearing a pair of soiled pants. We need to electrify this mother into next week, then bring it back into this week so we can knock it back again. Tennis.
What the world needs right now is a call-back the likes of which has not been seen before. Yes, I know what you’re thinking, what the world needs is a large steaming plate of Burakkas.
Kevindo Menendez knows what you’re pondering before you’ve had a chance to ponder it. Burakkas are back and they’re bigger (?) than ever. They’re the thing that does the thing that you need them to do but faster and possibly a little bit better. They’ll clean up that thing that shouldn’t be there, they’ll email that other thing that you should have emailed last week and then blame someone else for the delay.
Thought you forgot that thing? Well you didn’t because your Burakkas put a note in your phone or something similar, like a diary.
Where’s that thing that you lost? Ha, well it doesn’t matter because now you’ve got Burakkas and they’re much more versatile than whatever it is that you’re looking for. They’ve got your back.
I don’t know how you expected to get by in the post-2020 world without a friendly pair of hands by your side, handing you breath mints and stress relievers when life thrusts at you an unbuffed, wrongly-sized kitchen worktop straight through your front window and into your living room. What were you thinking?
The best news though is that for the next twelve months if you buy one pair of Burakkas you’ll get another pair for the same price, or maybe even a little bit more. How about that? Buy now and lots.
From Kevindo Menendez – a name that’s a name and it’s a name you can trust!
7 comments on “Burakkas (everybody loves)”
Can I get one burraka on a trial basis, and send it back for a full refund if it’s every bit as dreadful as I expect?
Trial burrakas are only available for people of the press (“press people”) and the special burraka group members.
You don’t know whether or not I’m a person of the press (“press person”). That information is private and I choose not to tell you. So I suggest you stick a trial burraka in the post, straight away, so I can get trialling. Thank you.
One burakka is no good to you. You’ll miss out on the stereo features, and also the Bluetooth connection is only in one side, so you’d have to make sure you got the correct one.
I should also mention that rude jerks also don’t get burakkas so buck your ‘chude up, sonny Jim, or you’ll get nowt.
Buy two, or more, like he says. In fact, buy them all.
I’m not buying anything from someone who calls me a jerk.
What I now plan to do is break in to the warehouse of the burakkas (“burakka warehouse”) under cover of darkness (“darkness cover”) and steal a shitload of them (“them”).
If you believe that our security (“a few loose ducks”) is not going to prevent (“excessive quacking”) you (as in you) from stealing our beloved burakkas (????) then you’ve got another thing coming (“possibly a careless badger”).