Category: Quick post made to earn a bean

Avatar Interlude

This month hasn’t been a great month for posting stuff, but luckily I had some stuff in mind so I’m just spamming the Beans with it tonight. The next one is some genuinely good content, but before we get to that, here’s something from a musical project we’ve all been trying to forget.

I still have hours and hours of this that we never even watched, let alone turned into something. Maybe this year I’ll do something with it all.

Avatar The last moment of March

This is what you get for posting in the last hours of the month.

Oh, sure, we’ve all done it. You think you’ve got a few more days to make another post, and then wham! It’s the 31st already and the minutes are running out. It’s like Geoffrey Chaucer himself put it: the Bean Counter waits for no man.

Anyway, I felt like I was on safe ground. The one year anniversary of the last podcast post had been and gone, and up my sleeve I had a nice little routine to post. It was going to be a transcript of a “missing” podcast episode. Stage directions indicating scuffling noises and someone eating something crinkly, a false start to asking a question, someone mishearing something. The subject would be along the lines of “what’s the longest you’ve had to wait for the next episode of something?”.

Anyway, I hadn’t written it yet, but in preparation I listened to Gravestones on my way home from work. That would be about two hours ago. In the intervening two hours, Kev has only gone and put another podcast up, hasn’t he? Unbelievable.

So the wind has been comprehensively extracted from my sails. Never mind. There’s four minutes of March left, so I will change course quite abruptly. It’s been a fairly middling day at the end of a fairly rough week, and this made me laugh. Let’s all watch this. Here’s to better times, and silliness, and listening to a new podcast episode on the way to work tomorrow. Thanks Kev. Even if it threw a spanner right in my stupid works.

Avatar Shrimp!

We have fish, we’ve had them a while but recently we had to move the tank out of the playroom to make room for Lego to be displayed. We didn’t really have anywhere else for them to go, so they went into the kitchen, and because its a kitchen the only place for them is in the window.

Apparently in a window isn’t the ideal place for a fish tank, as there’s too much light so christ knows how fish cope in nature. After a few weeks, sure enough we’ve started to get some algae growth in the water… whats the best way to deal with algae in a tank? Move it out of the sunlight? Chemicals? Nope, apparently its shrimp.

More impressive when you look up how to buy shrimp, is that you can buy them off eBay… through the post… alive.

I know, its mental. So say hello to “Wiggles” and “Swimmy Shrimpy”, named by the kids naturally…

Avatar The video is uploaded

That is all I have to say. It’s New Year’s Eve, my Christmas tree is already put away for next year and after a rather lengthy tidy up over a few days, the flat has never looked better.

You can now witness my unboxing of Chris’ mysterious package (not a euphemism)on the Tube of Yous and it will only take you less than a minute. I am making a list of items to purchase with all the revenue the video is going to generate. It’s going to be a huge winner.

I expect 2023 to be the best for everyone. Happy New Year to all.

Avatar Five Novembers ago

We bought our house from people who thought they’d be living there forever. They didn’t, because we sent them away so that we could have it all for ourselves. I regret nothing.

Anyway, last week we pulled all the wallpaper off the walls in what had been their baby room, and found a charming memento painted behind it that had presumably been intended to last for many years.

It lasted five years and we’ve painted over it. But here it is, a message from five Novembers ago, just to prove it once existed.

Avatar Mysterious shed

Picture this:

Two men are sat watching some good old fashioned rock and roll music at a gig. They’ve already had to endure the poor organisational skills of Huddersfield, Wetherspoons meals without the drinks (because the wait for drinks was longer than the food for some reason), rain, snow, sleet, drunk Yorkshire idiots and a winding, zig-zagging queue to get inside.

The support act were fine. The sun came out and the woman took her top off. If only the sound system was decent enough to make what she was shouting about audible but you can’t have everything I suppose.

The first band came on and despite numerous jokes at their expense (not from me), a jolly good time was had by all, especially when they did a rousing cover of ‘Enter Sandman’ by Metallic and a soothing rendition of ‘Africa’ by Toto.

The second band began their set with a weird recorded message by some semi-famous actor guy who I recognise the face of but can never remember his name. About four songs in the band suddenly decided to leave the stage.

“What’s going on?” everyone asks.

Cue the stagehands and roadies going backstage and trying to wheel on what can only be described as the world’s most unnecessarily large shed (FYI it looked more like a log cabin to me, Kev’s description is the official description though because he said it first). The shed is so big they struggle to get it onto the stage because a corner keeps getting caught on something. Manoeuvre, pivot, manoeuvre, pivot. A few minutes later it’s wheeled into the middle and the drummer climbs on top.

The band then do a two further songs before sacking the shed off and putting it back where they found it.

Was the shed some kind of protest? Probably not. Were the two songs that the band sung whilst it was there based around sheds? Did they sing ‘Sweet Shed of Mine’ and ‘My Love (How I Shed Those Tears For You)’? No they did not. Did the shed have anything to do with what was happening onstage? Not in the slightest.

It’s times like these that does make you wonder if anything actually makes sense anymore.