Category: Aquatic

Avatar The Kipper Experience

You will all be sad to know that my washing-machine repair days are finally behind me. Even though it was only a career that lasted a couple of years, I feel as though I have given all I can give. Anyone who is still on the waiting list, I will do my best to see to your fallen machines however you may choose to seek another professional’s due care and attention if the fault demands immediate attention.

A wise man once told me, “Life is for living,” and boy was he right. Sometimes you have to take a leap into the unknown in order to find the right thing for you. In a way I have always known what I wanted to do and it is only now that I have managed to sort myself out. What my life needed was kippers.

Kippers are the only food you can have for any meal. They’re small, oily and very popular around the world. What I mean by a ‘Kipper Experience’ is one whereby you live like a kipper. You are one with the kipper. There are so many things that you can learn by becoming a kipper that most people are completely unaware of. Yes, it does demand a lot of your time. You can sign up for one of the weekend retreats to begin with, just in case you are a little uncertain as to whether this is the right thing for you, but once you’ve gotten past this hurdle I would thoroughly recommend the week and month long excursions available.

Very soon I will be taking off to the Isle of Man. I have just returned from a week in the village of Craster in Northumberland, living the kipper dream. I met a large array of different kippers, all of whom welcomed me as one of their own. I can only hope that when you choose a ‘Kipper Experience’ it will be as wonderful as my own.

Avatar Great idea

A little while ago I went to a place called Southend, which is like a town, but it’s next to the sea, so it’s a kind of sea-town. It’s not actually in the sea, but it’s, like, right next to it.

Anyway, they have a thing called a “pier” which is like a long thin extension of the ground that lets you see what it’s like to walk on the sea without getting wet. I used the “pier” to walk a long way out on the sea and look at what Southend looks like from the middle of the sea. Normally that view would be difficult to look at because I’d be swimming and the water would get in my eyes.

If you stand in the middle of the sea and look at Southend it looks like this:

Southend from the pier

 

I started wondering whether this novel “pier” concept could be used in other situations too. Here are some of my “pier ideas”.

  1. Mountain pier. A pier extending outwards from the peak of a mountain, so you can see what it’s like to walk flat from the top of the mountain instead of going down. You could then look at what the mountain looks like from up in the air next to the mountain.
  2. Space pier. A pier that goes upwards instead of outwards, maybe not from Southend, so you can walk into space and look at earth from outside the atmosphere.
  3. Desert pier. A pier that goes over the desert because the desert is very hot so if you could walk on a pier instead you wouldn’t burn your feet on the hot sand and also it would be a bit higher up so there might be a nice breeze.
  4. Underwater pier. Like a pier on the sea, but under the sea, so people who want to walk in the sea instead of on top of it can have a nice flat surface to walk on.

Avatar The end (probably) of #TapSaga

That’s it. It’s over. For now at least anyway.

If anyone ever suggests to you that changing the taps in the bathroom is a quick and easy way to ‘refresh’ your room, my advice is to punch them swiftly in the face.

btaps staps

 

Let me give you a summary of what has gone on so far in #TapSaga in abbreviated bullet list format:

Read More: The end (probably) of #TapSaga »

Avatar Frog and Kitty

Let’s unpack March and screw it together with this important ethical dilemma.

Frog and Kitty are clearly comfortable with their unorthodox relationship. But what’s the basis of this? Does Frog really think Kitty is delicious? Or is there something else going on, something deeper?